Tips to increase your child’s self-confidence

Author – Vaishnavi Deepak.

People who are confident are eager to learn new skills and face new challenges.

Tips to increase your child’s self-confidence

As Oprah Winfrey astutely said, “It is confidence in our bodies, minds, and spirits that allows us to keep looking for new adventures.”

As adults, we often face pangs of low confidence and are reminded of our insecurities. In a later stage of life, being set in our ways, it is hard to evolve overnight into a more self- assured individual.

Besides, most of these issues stem from the early days of our development- our childhood.

For children today, it is vital to grow up with a sense of self-worth to be able to match steps with their peers. Self-confidence is crucial for getting along with others and working out  many social challenges—such as sharing, competing, and making friends—that children face in school settings.

Parents are, thus, increasingly concerned about ensuring their kids  not getting sucked into the traps of demotivation or discouragement.

Taking into account this alarming need to ensure children are confident and assured at all times, we have compiled a list of tips that will come handy to parents that are on the quest to raise happier children-

  • Appreciate any effort – Be it small or big, effort must always be applauded. A kid’s journey is really the cumulation of all the efforts they take to build themselves. Be sure, however, to not delude your child from the realities of their work through excessive appreciation. Keep it moderate, but more importantly, keep it constant. It works like an incentive to strive harder and hence, grow.
  • Encourage interests and passions – Back your child at whatever they wish to practice or show interest in. Most young prodigies swear by early beginnings and your nod of approval or push in the right direction might steady them into something they could be great at. Also, having well rounded personalities  are most of the times synonymous with confidence and the process must begin early.

“Practice invests effort in the confident expectation that improvement will follow.”

  • Quit rescuing them – It is only natural to have a parental pang when you find misery befalling your child. Your gut then drives you to do the best to singlehandedly rescue them out of it. However, replace this instinct with the understanding that children only learn and grow from obstacles. Allow your kids to take chances and risks and come out of them on their own merit. This small moment of holding back on your part will translate to greater outcomes in their crisis management abilities, independence and self-worth.
  • Promote problem solving – Running on similar lines as the previous tip, promoting problem solving in your child can encourage them to mature and come up with innovative ideas to get through their roadblocks.

Author of the book, ‘Raising a thinking child’, Myrna Shure says, “Kids are confident when they are able to negotiate getting what they want.”

In this context, setting up an environment of reasoning and cogent arguments to come around every situation of disagreement at home can be effective in helping kids develop the ability and confidence to back themselves in the future.

  • Fantasise about the future – If kids can envision themselves doing something important or fulfilling, when they grow up, they are bound to feel more confident now. Talk to your child about how you, or other acquainted adults, chose careers. Your child may dream of being an international singer or an astronaut, but don’t try to lower their expectations. Even if they change their mind, the important thing is that they are thinking about their goals.

“Kids have to learn to measure themselves against themselves.” says family therapist Jay Scott Fitter, author of ‘Respect Your Children’. Envisioning the skill set they would require in comparison to what they have, will instil a drive to develop their personalities. As enticing as the future might be, the focus should still lay on personal growth. This is their gauntlet to healthy confidence.

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